I recently spent a weekend in Hong Kong for two reasons: to attend the wedding of a friend I haven't seen in years and to see 3-D Sex and Zen: Extreme Ecstasy , the newest installment in the Sex and Zen pornographic franchise, a film marketed as the world's first feature-length 3-D porno movie. Considering the cast is made up of mainstream Hong Kong actors with a few Japanese AV starts thrown in for good measure , the chances of actually seeing two people have real sex were pretty low to start with. I've taken you all to the climax. Make no mistake: this is a mainstream movie. It follows a young scholar as he abandons his wife and descends into an underworld of sex and violence. Unfortunately, it turns out that Wei's ding-a-ling is just too tiny to learn the Elder's secrets. No attempts by the film's so-called actors and actresses to break the record for the amount of fluid secreted during orgasm! What can I say? One girl is literally, umm, bonked to death. More common still, if you, Shanghai, are like anyone I know, the mention of the words "3-D porn" spawns a veritable orgy of obscene images in your mind. Those looking to relive the glory days of "Skinamax" will feel very at home. It's not for the feint of heart. Even after wooing and bedding very, very "quickly" the woman of his dreams, Tie Yuxiang Leni Nam , he's off on an undercover muckraking expedition to the lair of the Prince of Ning Tony Ho , which for all intents and purposes is a gigantic brothel carved into a mountain. In the opening lines of the novel, the author Li Yu tells his readers that he will use his discussions of lechery to overcome lechery. No actual penetration! I left the theater feeling pretty bewildered. It's a proposition that can't help but arouse our most prurient interests.